Day Two....Healing Tears
Oh the tears, the tears will come next. The tears will spill so easily onto your cheeks. They will distort the beautiful face you try to paint on that morning …or maybe the macho…I have it together look that I see in some widowers. The strong emotions will turn you into a faucet with no handles. The uncontrolled tears will allow the pain to manifest itself into gut wrenching sobs as you cry out to God for answers. You let them fall freely at first, after all, everyone understands the poor grieving widow or widower. Then, somehow, you will begin to harden yourself, or maybe you just become numb, or dehydrated, but at some point you begin to have some control over when you totally break down.
The irony of this human way of dealing with our pain is the danger it presents. The absence of tears is equated with the dulling of our pain. We are falsely lured into the belief that we are healing. But in reality, the absence of tears is evidence of your hardened heart. As long as your weakness is manifested in these tears, your human nature is not in control. If we try to control the tears, we, not God control our healing. Many places does the bible mention this need to maintain a ‘soft’ heart, but in Hebrews, Paul uses this concept to teach s about this danger.
Hebrews 3:6-10
6But Christ as a son over his own house; whose house are we, if we hold fast the confidence and the rejoicing of the hope firm unto the end.
7Wherefore (as the Holy Ghost saith, To day if ye will hear his voice,
8Harden not your hearts, as in the provocation, in the day of temptation in the wilderness:
9When your fathers tempted me, proved me, and saw my works forty years.
10Wherefore I was grieved with that generation, and said, They do alway err in their heart; and they have not known my ways.
The tears I feel are evidence of God at work in my heart. In letting go of the control over when and where the tears are allowed to flow, I rest in God to do his healing work in me. I rest in God and allow him to choose the time and place my tears will soften my heart and allow me to listen to his voice. Many places tears are mentioned in the bible. Each reference is an example of just this kind of healing.
2 Kings 20:5:
5Turn again, and tell Hezekiah the captain of my people, Thus saith the LORD, the God of David thy father, I have heard thy prayer, I have seen thy tears: behold, I will heal thee: on the third day thou shalt go up unto the house of the LORD.
Job 16:20:
20My friends scorn me: but mine eye poureth out tears unto God.
Psalm 39:12:
12Hear my prayer, O LORD, and give ear unto my cry; hold not thy peace at my tears: for I am a stranger with thee, and a sojourner, as all my fathers were.
Psalm 126:5:
5They that sow in tears shall reap in joy.
John 11:35:
35Jesus wept.
Many people of the bible knew the healing power of tears, especially Jesus. How deep his pain must have been as he waited for the father to tell him it was ok to travel back to his dear friend Lazarus. Our Jesus, who already knew the ending to this seemingly sad story, still had to endure the pain of not only his own grief, but the grief of Martha, Mary and the many other townspeople who were gathered to mourn for their friend. I think our Jesus, who also had his father’s ears, could hear the cries of pain coming from those dear souls as they waited in disbelief that he was not already there to save Lazarus. At the same instant he was dealing with his own need to rest in the patience of the father. Receiving his orders from the father that it was time to glorify God, and seeing the multitude of people that would witness this miracle he was overwhelmed by this mixture of emotions and he wept.
Oh how this teaches us to let the tears fall. We need to let these tears cleanse our soul from the pain that threatens to harden our heart. We need to let the tears fade the pain into sweet memories of our loved ones that bring new tears of joy. I for one am blessed to know that my Mitchell is smiling down on me from his heavenly home. In only a moment, the twinkling of an eye, God will call me home someday soon. My ‘temporary’ separation from him will someday be over.
My tears are still mixtures of pain and joy. I hope I never encounter a day when I am pain free, for in my pain I grow in knowledge of the father. On second thought, maybe I will allow one day of pain free living, the day he calls me home.
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